I feel like typing until my fingers are broken but I have nothing to say except that I wish I had something to say. The conundrum of the writer writing about having terrible writer's block; maybe this will blossom into something unknown and beautiful.
Nah. Maybe not.



I would like to stay in bed and watch movies and do nothing and eat pizza with you because you are one of the few people I can be content doing nothing with. There is no pressure to entertain. Besides, you know more about movies and directors than anyone I know. And we witnessed that light in my room that day. Wish you were here for spring break, but this means you will be around for the summer, yeah? See you when you get home. I have Funny Games now, just so you know.

I connected all the things I love
with red thread

--------------just in case I lost sight of one
-------------and could not breathe.

---------------------I guess I tied it around your neck too tight
----------------cause when I found you, you were bright blue.

sweaty palms

you might have thought we could be in love
but that prospect just makes me laugh
because I only like the way our palms sweat when we hold hands
and how fast your heart beats when you think of kissing me
and how we almost fit together, almost, not quite
and I don't mean to break your heart
but I don't mean to do a lot of things I do

you might have thought we could be some kind of forever
but that just makes me smile
because I only like the sound your car door makes when I slam it shut
and the way your eyes dart around in the TV-blue light
and the way your mouth fits with mine, again almost, but not quite
and I don't mean to break your heart
but I don't mean to do a lot of things I do

imitation

wrote some of my own a softer world style poem/comic/vignette/things(?) today...

1.
sometimes I think about crashing the car

------------------------because I am tired of driving
--------------------------------with no place to go

----------------------------------and with no car maybe we could
----------------------------------walk to nowhere instead.

2.
I know you're going through
-------a lot of changes right now;

----------------------zombification is tough,

---------------------------------------------but I am going to need my
--------------------------------------Springsteen records back. now.

3.
when I look at the clouds
I can see the future.

-------------------------------war here in five years,
-------------------------------famine there within the
---------------------------------------------------decade.

---------------------------------------sometimes it's good stuff too,
-----------------------like you and me skinny-dipping tonight.

-I think you are beautiful
and I would like to kiss you.

-------------------I can think up some
----------------------------clever lines,
-------------------------if you'd prefer.

---------------------------------------But I wanted to
-------------------------------------------say that, first.

what?

you don't taste like the others.


"I never expected you to be nice, but nobody should ever feel that powerful."

mistake made and it only existed in movies once but now i can understand the reaction and the immediate regret

i found my moleskine

most of the time my spine hurts because I never have any kind of decent posture
lately I cannot stand the way my hair falls in my face
so I think i will just cut it all off and put it in a box
and stash it under the bed
so when you ask me where all my hair's gone I will have an exact answer.

you might have thought we could be in love
but that just makes me laugh
because I only like the way our palms sweat when we hold hands
and how fast your heart beats when you think about kissing me
and how we almost fit together but don't, not really
and I don't mean to break your heart
but I don't mean to do a lot of things I do

how does it feel to you when I tell you what I believe?
and how does it feel when we talk about things that have gone and happened?
the smiles in your eyes are back again I haven't seen them in quite a while, where've they been?
I haven't seen you in quite a while, where've you been?

pet cemetery

this morning i walked out
to my backyard
and i'll tell you what i saw
it was something to behold

i saw a
hamster limping my way
with a look of ferocity in his eyes
and a parakeet long expired
looking to peck out my brains

my dead pets are alive
i think they want revenge
my old best friends are zombies
i think they want my flesh

now there's a
guinea pig missing two legs
dragging himself towards my living flesh
accompanied by a rat
stumbling blindly without any eyes

my dead pets are alive
i think they want revenge
my old best friends are zombies
i think they want my flesh

now i'm running back inside
to barricade the windows and doors
cause i once had a pet tiger (don't ask)
and I don't know how long i'll last

my dead pets are alive
i think they want revenge
my old best friends are zombies
i think they want my flesh
my dead pets are alive
i think they want revenge
my old best friends are zombies
i think they want my flesh

I do not understand what I am doing
what are we doing?
when does it start and stop mattering
because I cannot tell anymore
I feel like if I stumbled into a forest of redwoods
I would never come out
or maybe just never come out the same

I find more intimacy in fingers and toes
than I have ever found in lips
because fingers and toes have so much more responsibility
and my words usually come out wrong when I speak
but my fingers let my words think before they reach
you